Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

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Prodigal Son
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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by Prodigal Son » Tue Feb 08, 2011 6:31 pm

Why can't more men break free? I for one don't need it, never have done either but you only have to look around or listen to what people say and you'll soon see that it's one of the most powerful forces at play in our society. No matter where I go, who I speak with or what I do, women always come up, in one way or another. I'm not particularly bothered or interested in specifically but I am greatly interested in their actions and what they do. Another poster for whom I hold a great respect on here recently mentioned that "for a being that looks so beautiful; how can it be so evil?" and that is why I don't understand how men still need/seek their approval and, in some cases, even after breaking free. Now, please forgive me if I come across as somewhat negative in this posting because that isn't my intention at all. I do, however, notice that a few people here still seek the approval of females (subconsciously or otherwise) and my question is this: do they know they're doing it? It's probably quite difficult to erase a lifetime of being told something but as I grew up in somewhat different circumstances I've never had those "norms" to deal with in the first place and so maybe that's a good thing. This is probably a very muddled post, just some thoughts that were on my mind and if this is of no relevance then please, do let me know.

I wish you all the very best, gentlemen.
PS

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by pcr2 » Tue Feb 08, 2011 7:23 pm

Same here onezero. I only display Chivalry to my family and some female friends. The rest can all rot in hell for all I care.

I'm not looking for approval anymore. Its striking to see that they immediately have you in higher regard because you don't give a damn about them. It gives you a good insight in their enormous female intuition :roll:

You want a man who doesn't give a shit if you live or die. NOW THAT sounds like a great investment! [/female brain in action]

Remember, a cold stare to a man is enough, to a women they only want more. All they can get is my middle finger.

PCR

lavastorm

Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by lavastorm » Tue Feb 08, 2011 7:38 pm

My chivalry and good manners only extend to female family members (all were born and raised outside of the Anglosphere).

The rest can drown in their "grrl power" and "independence."

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by sjenner » Tue Feb 08, 2011 7:41 pm

I have my joy and less stress after ghosting and not giving a rats ass about what women think.
Unfortunately most men especially young pussy whipped men under 30 seem to have what women care about as the center of their lives. How sad and pathetic!

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superbad
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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by superbad » Tue Feb 08, 2011 8:26 pm

+1 . your posts always rock.

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by hhb » Tue Feb 08, 2011 10:05 pm

Guys,

Men have been programed to need women approval. Sort of like "Pavlov's Dogs".
Ruff, Ruff.

Also, women hate you for it.

HHB

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by hhb » Wed Feb 09, 2011 12:01 am


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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by hhb » Wed Feb 09, 2011 12:20 am


sjenner
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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by sjenner » Wed Feb 09, 2011 12:40 am

True well after watching the movie Extract, it just shows how evil women are.

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by silentstorm666 » Wed Feb 09, 2011 1:10 am

If you read Esther Vilar's "The Manipulated Man" she gives a pretty good explanation. Briefly, it starts from birth onwards as women, in the almost all cases, have the exclusivity of bringing up of a child, no matter if its the mother, grandmother, babysitter or other, its always a woman, while the father (figure) is absent for the majority of time for whatever reason. In that process the woman sets the conditioning of what is acceptable and what is not in a childs behaviour. Hence, the need for approval being positive.

"She takes care that man is directly trained for a particular purpose: he must work and put the fruits of his labor at her disposal. Woman has had this aim in view throughout the upbringing of her child and she engenders in him a series of conditioned reflexes which cause him to produce everything to satisfy her material needs. She does this by manipulating him from his first year of life. Consequently, by the time his education is complete, man will judge his own value by woman's estimation of his usefulness. He will be happy only when he has won her praise and produced something of value to her." p.22

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by dsc » Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:41 am

[quote]If you read Esther Vilar's "The Manipulated Man" she gives a pretty good explanation[/quote]

Yup, you beat me to it.

Every guy should read 'The Manipulated Man'.

Seems to me the PDF version can be downloaded for free these days from the Internet.

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by pcr2 » Wed Feb 09, 2011 6:58 am

Don't forget The Prince. Women think instinctively like Machiavelli's.

Ever since reading that book, i've been much more aware of my options in dealing with people

PCR

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by sjenner » Wed Feb 09, 2011 9:52 am

Well to me at least in my experience, manginas and vile men are more dangerous than women. At least I can tell a woman is trying to rip me off or stab me in the back. Men are sneaky these days and pander to women so they play games and will sell out their brother for the pussy pass.

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by pcr2 » Wed Feb 09, 2011 11:32 am

[quote]Don't forget The Prince. Women think instinctively like Machiavelli's.

Ever since reading that book, i've been much more aware of my options in dealing with people

PCR[/quote]

Machiavelli is a man's interpretation of what comes naturally to women, it's a pale approximation because he also used quite a bit of logic, which is a male perspective, in his analysis of power and how to wield it.

Women on the other hand have no logical basis for their actions, it's all motivated by pure emotional reaction. This is why Machiavelli is only an approximation, women are far more unpredictable in their scheming and far more damaging.

A male ruler, even an iron fisted one, has reasons for the things he does, women on the other hand usually don't aside from the old excuse "because I wanted to!". [/quote]

+1 Spock! Very true sadly. Esp. what you say is that these machiavellian tactics come naturally to them, but controlling them is absent.

There is nothing more dangerous than fools with power....just look at the pigs for example

PCR

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by christopheroregon » Wed Feb 09, 2011 4:12 pm

Yeah, what Spock said.

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by Prodigal Son » Wed Feb 09, 2011 4:22 pm

Gents, this is great stuff, thank you very much indeed!
PS

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by ryan30 » Thu Feb 10, 2011 4:12 am

[quote]
specifically but I am greatly interested in their actions and what they do. Another poster for whom I hold a great respect on here recently mentioned that "for a being that looks so beautiful; how can it be so evil?" and that is why I don't understand how men still need/seek their approval and, in some cases, even after breaking free. Now, please forgive me if I come across as somewhat negative in this posting because that isn't my intention at all. I do, however, notice that a few people here still seek the approval of females (subconsciously or otherwise) and my question is this: do they know they're doing it? It's probably quite difficult to erase a lifetime of being told something but as I grew up in somewhat different circumstances I've never had those "norms" to deal with in the first place and so maybe that's a good thing. This is probably a very muddled post, just some thoughts that were on my mind and if this is of no relevance then please, do let me know.

I wish you all the very best, gentlemen.
PS[/quote]

There are two parts to the "problem" of the need for approval from women, one is purely instinctual and hormonal, the second is societal.
The first is very tough to overcome when you're young, the male mating drive is extremely strong the the late teens and early 20s. Seeking approval from females is and always has been a part of the age old mating game.

Part of the mating game is also that males need to prove themselves worthy to procreate, not just take a woman and rape her but provide from the children and the tribe. It's why all that societal infrastructure called civilization was setup in the first place, as more of an agreed upon device to impress women.

The second major influence is societal, how men are raised as children and their indoctrination into their society's cultural norms and expectations.
We all know that babies are programmed from birth to know and be able to distinguish their mother's voice, smell and other characteristics. Little boys and girls naturally seek approval from their parents, especially their mothers.

In almost all societies through out history men were taught to revere their parents and especially their mothers. This kind of programming carries over to some extent when viewing other women, this kind of thing expresses itself in "chivalry" and an almost automatic deference to women and defense of women.

Most men will never realize just how deeply ingrained their programming is and how hard it is to break it. Some men will never acknowledge they are programmed and hence they will never understand they are vulnerable.
Look at most manginas for an example of this willful blindness, look at the losers who marry multiple times and each time their marriage fails and they're taken to the cleaners. What is their excuse "I can't imagine myself growing old alone", "Man was never meant to be alone!", "I need to woman to complete me and give meaning and purpose to my life!".
These are men who are more robot then human, are acting and behaving at a subconscious level and never as a fully thinking man, more like a well trained pet.

The male need for approval declines by the time men reach their mid 30s, when their hormones are down to a manageable level and their life experiences eventually soak in enough for some to realize that women don't belong on a pedestal(even their mothers) and never should've been put on one in the first place.[/quote]

Question Spock!!!!

Does this mean....that our parents....especially our mothers did a lousy job at manipulating us into become obedient sheep who will bend over backwards to accommodate women? :P How did we break free?

Seems so!!! An exception maybe CIO's mother who warned him about women....other than that we all had the same programming.

I am directing this question to those who never married, never dated kinda guys....not those who learned from experience.

lavastorm

Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by lavastorm » Thu Feb 10, 2011 12:17 pm

Ryan29, I will attempt to answer your question since I have never dated and sure as hell will not marry. My answer comes from my personal experience so it may vary from man to man.

Part of my de-programming came from my mother. She becomes viciously defensive if ANY woman (particularly WW/single mothers/divorced) come too close to my Dad. My Dad and I thought she was overreacting but she was always correct about these women.

Another part of the deprogramming process came from the PUAs whom I befriended in college. Though they pedestalized women, they opened my eyes to the demons lurking within. They expected me to absorb their lessons and become a PUA. I absorbed their lessons and became much more.

Finally, it was an open mind that brought me here and to other forums, blogs, etc. That, combined with the above processes and plus I am just getting older (I will 28 within a few months) finally sent the message home.

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by pcr2 » Thu Feb 10, 2011 4:01 pm

[/quote]

I did date but was warned from early age with subtle hints by my father. That and that i've always been a sharp observer of how persons interact.

The way married men interact with their wives in my family (all dogs essentialy) and 2 psycho GF's were enough for me to see through the bullshit

PS, you need to read both the Prince and the Manipulated Man. Combine these 2 (and spocks advice :D) and you'll get a general picture of women.

Not pretty, though.
PCR

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Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by Modelautoman » Thu Feb 10, 2011 7:47 pm

My paternal grandmother and aunt had a lot to do with how I
turned out. At an earlyh age you find out what its like to be an
emotional tampon. Women and their "logic."

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Re: Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by inplainsight » Tue May 24, 2016 4:06 pm

dsc wrote:
If you read Esther Vilar's "The Manipulated Man" she gives a pretty good explanation
Yup, you beat me to it.

Every guy should read 'The Manipulated Man'.

Seems to me the PDF version can be downloaded for free these days from the Internet.
Yes a pdf copy can be downloaded in less than 30 seconds off the internet. Men really have no excuse these days.
every man is worth just so much as the things are worth about which he busies himself

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Re: Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by inplainsight » Tue May 24, 2016 4:07 pm

sjenner wrote:Well to me at least in my experience, manginas and vile men are more dangerous than women. At least I can tell a woman is trying to rip me off or stab me in the back. Men are sneaky these days and pander to women so they play games and will sell out their brother for the pussy pass.
It took me a many years before I eventually realized that the heart of problem isn't women per se. It is actually us guys. I have addressed this subject in my post: I am the architect of my own demise
every man is worth just so much as the things are worth about which he busies himself

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Re: Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by mongolking » Tue May 24, 2016 5:01 pm

Why is the male need of female approval so strong?
I don't think the answer could be more obvious: because we were brought up by them. We all had mothers. The most impressionable years of our lives were dominated by women. We looked up to them for guidance in everything. Their validation, at that age, was a life and death thing.

It's basically an old, bad habit that has outlasted its usefulness.

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Re: Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by Revenant » Wed May 25, 2016 3:58 pm

Are we any less seeking of male approval?

I've known several men that have labored their whole lives to live up to their father's expectations or worse yet live the dreams their fathers couldn't achieve.

If any of you have seen the old film "Fear Strikes Out" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fear_Strikes_Out
It deals with this very thing it's the true story of baseball great Jimmy Piersall and how his overbearing father caused him a nervous breakdown.

I watched this with my father once and he told me he had seen it before I was born and it convinced him to never push me at all...unfortunately I think he overdid it a bit and raised something of a layabout :roll: (fodder for some future post I'm sure)

Even if not a father I think many of us have gone through a period where we idolized another man and his abilities (usually in childhood) whether he was deserving or not. Hopefully we weren't quite to this level of being a sycophant displayed here:

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2ip9wx

I can remember my childhood pal I wanted to be just like him. He was always a little taller than me, ran a little faster, had better toys was more ambitious.

It's funny now, he's been twice divorced from the same woman and spent considerable amount of his hard earned money to raise her children from another man and now he's onto another wife raising her children! He's bitter and angry all the time.
I wouldn't want to hear a thing he has to say or be anything like him.

Then there are those that are driven by approval of the church or the military.

I've strived to go my own way and not work for anyone's approval. A winding and difficult road for sure.

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Re: Why is the male need of female approval so strong?

Post by pottedmeat » Thu May 26, 2016 1:29 pm

I think one reason men seek female approval is this: men think women are the ultimate arbiters of male quality..."hey, this hot thing is with ME, therefore I must be better than most other dudes".

There are many factors that can contribute to male liberation from female and societal expectations. One of them is realizing that no one gives a piss about you. I've enjoyed this realization. It takes the lid of the pressure cooker, and allows one to enjoy this life a little.

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